Sunday, February 3, 2013

Men don't they?

Recently, I wrote a scene into one of my WIPs that involved my hero crying.  Not falling to the floor trembling from the power of his sobs.  But, crying as he asked the woman he loved to forgive him for not being there when she needed him.

It's a true turning point in my story.

But, when I actually thought about the men in my life and the number of times that I've seen them cry the number was small.  My father cried when his mother passed.  My brother cried when our mother's parents died.  An ex cried when his friend committed suicide.

I don't think of myself as any kind of a tender heart, but I must admit I do cry at commercials, hallmark cards, and sometimes romantic movies :-)

For me, it doesn't damage a man's manhood if he cries.  But, then, why do we tell little boys big boys don't cry?

I do love the strong alpha male, but admittedly I am probably equally, if not more so, attracted to a man's intelligence.  If you put Sherlock Holmes' mind into the body of Brad Pitt or Shemar Moore, I'd be an insanely happy woman.

How do men see it?  I asked this question of my friends, and it seems that they don't agree with me.  My male friends that is.  My female friends don't have any huge objection.  But, they all admit, in confidence, that they don't want to have the men in their lives curl up on the couch beside them with a handkerchief as he sobs while watching "Steel Magnolias."

I don't know.  I guess I think it's kind of sad that we train young boys at such an early age not to cry.  In essence, we're telling them to mask their feelings.


1 comment:

  1. I haven't read the entire article, I just want to comment on the title.
    I commented on another person comment on my blog earlier about this topic.
    The stigma that "men don't cry" causes a lot of psychological damage.
    Well done for writing such a piece.